Home sick today from a stomach-bug. By this morning, to be honest I could have made it through school, but I needed a break. Still a but queasy at the moment, but enough about that. It's tie for more Internal Analysis.
Lately I feel I may be revealing too much about myself to people, and I fear it's making me less likable. That sounds a bit weird, but don't worry. I'm not talking about gross, personal stuff. More like letting on parts of my... less reputable side.
For instance, I partake in the ingestion of illegal liquids. I don't go boasting about it, or act differently because I do it. Honestly, I don't even do it that often. But if it comes up in conversation, I'm not going to lie about it. So when people that are less likely to be okay with this hear about how I drink, I worry that it will change the way they think of me.
I realized that I should be a bit more concerned while at the Shul-in over the weekend. It came up in conversation, and I was worried about the impression I was making on people I just don't know that well. I know I'm no different because of it, but I have no idea what goes through their mind.
And that doesn't even bother me as much as the next topic that just had to arise. In an awfully short session of "truth or truth" I was asked about the last thing I stole. I can talk about drinking, but I just feel embarrassed when talking about Kleptomania. I mean someone who drinks is (pretty much) average, whatever. But someone who steals things is just not cool. And I don't think it's cool, and that's why I hate when it comes up. I'm only talking about it now because A.) It's necessary for the post and B.) I guess I don't mind anyone who reads this knowing.
Anyway, I wish I had made more of an effort to clear my name at that Shul-In, because now I think some of those people think less of me... this is an awful way to end the post...
And that doesn't even bother me as much as the next topic that just had to arise. In an awfully short session of "truth or truth" I was asked about the last thing I stole. I can talk about drinking, but I just feel embarrassed when talking about Kleptomania. I mean someone who drinks is (pretty much) average, whatever. But someone who steals things is just not cool. And I don't think it's cool, and that's why I hate when it comes up. I'm only talking about it now because A.) It's necessary for the post and B.) I guess I don't mind anyone who reads this knowing.
Anyway, I wish I had made more of an effort to clear my name at that Shul-In, because now I think some of those people think less of me... this is an awful way to end the post...
7 Ramblings:
from my point of view, I don't think anyone should have judged you from the shul in. It's a partyish thing, and you don't see who a person really is from a few hours with them. I mean we didn't really ask you all your glorious attributes, we asked you the embarrassing things for truth or dare. so to sum, we only know a few random things about Lewis Siragusa but not the more important things. (:
Hey, I'm really sorry. I was the one who asked that question, and I was really surprised to see it's been bothering you, so I'm extremely sorry. And Sophie's right, you might really be over-thinking this; most people haven't even given it a second thought, let alone changed their opinion of you because of it. I for one don't even remember what you answered, what the other questions were, who answered them, or what they said. This is Maria by the way, and I love you!
I guess I am beign a little paranoid. Thanks
I think it's really brave of you to be able to reveal stuff like that about yourself.
Although I don't condone drinking at all (verrry alcoholic father and most of my family), I wouldn't think less of you for it.
Anyway I like learning things about you, don't stop just because you think that people will change the way they look at you drastically. If they do, they probably weren't worth it in the first place.
I only think less of you because you assume I don't read just because I don't comment.
Oh, and you drink, but I just ignore that and I'm happy.
Haha
Ok, I tried posting this before so forgive me if it shows up twice, but I don't think people think less of you, in fact, I know that people at that shul-in really liked you. We know a lot of the crazy stuff people at temple do, and that's not really what we judge you by. And though a person is defined by what they do, they are also defined by their personality and sense of humor and a lot of other things that make a person who they are. There are many sides to one person. I know I'm pretty multi-faceted. I don't really condone drinking either, but I think as we progress in high school and (some of us) begin to mature, we realize that there isn't just black and white; not everything is just good or just bad. There are a lot of grey areas. Sorry to be a creep and keep posting these long thoughts even though i don't know you too well. i can just relate to some of this...
Post a Comment